Actually, we don't know if we're qualified to narrow that down to just five, since, you know, Naomi and I collectively are less than 50. So! How about just the past 20 years?
If we've missed something you really hated, please discuss. There were plenty of runners-up for this list.
Stirrup pants: Now we know it's appealing to wear trousers that could allow you to ride a horse after your daily snack. However, there's something to be said for not anchoring your legwear to the soles of your feet unless absolutely necessary.
Parachute pants: Oh, ripstop nylon...you sooo sexy. Full disclosure: I owned some, but it was after knee surgery, and I blame the morphine.
Scrunchies: A donut of fabric on your ponytail or bun - what's not to love? Of course since we're going back to the '90s for this trend, we have to admit it's opposite day and we really don't mean love.
Exposed thongs: Britney Spears, tisk! And we thought regular visible panty line - the under-the-clothes type - was a problem.
Patchwork denim: Which wash should I choose? Will my jeans match the rest of my outfit? Apparently, the solution is to wear as many types of denim as you can at once. This always makes me think of those contests that make you guess the number of jelly beans in a jar to win a prize. If I count all the patches, what do I get?